i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I can text with my tongue
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
