I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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