I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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