There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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