some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
