last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
