we're blogging at a bar
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
