I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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