I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
