Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize