How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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