So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
