I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
