ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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