considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize