I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
