Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
