haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
