How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize