16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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