dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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