Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize
