do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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