Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
