It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Randomize
