Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
