He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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