at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
