If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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