By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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