is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
