btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
