Christians are straight up FREAKS
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
