"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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