The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
