I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize