Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
