She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
