i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
