i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I think I am morally bankrupt
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
did i just pee glitter
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
