you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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