Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
