I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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