Welp...herpes.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
