i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize