I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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