GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
