Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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