I'm going to jail i love you
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
