Your dad touched me again.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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