we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
